I’ve been such an advocator for subtitles since the beginning. Recently though I’ve been growing away from them. I feel like from a cinematic aspect I’ve been missing out on some of the pivotal moments they portray in the movies. I’ve become too busy listening to them talk while I’m reading the words on the bottom of the screen that I essentially miss all of the cinamatology during the films. It’s got to the point to where I forgot what a Guy Richie film was like.

In an ignorant and optimistic view on watching tv, I tell myself that the subtitles make me feel like I’m working out my brain by reading. Well in reality it does nothing but tarsi our brains, even if we’re reading. To me it feels nice to be able to see all of the letters that make up all of the words they say. Subtitles are the only reason why I’m could consider watching a show like Game of Thrones. A show with all that old english dialog I can’t understand without the subtitles.

On the flip side of this subtitles argument it completely ruined my movie last night. There I was setting myself up for a three hour nail bitter. I had my popcorn next to me, my drink filled, and confirmed that I had the subtitles on. The movies started off with this ominous guy breathing into the phone. Before he even said a word, the subtitles clarified his name, letting us know exactly who it was breathing into this phone. This was the first and only time we heard his name, his voice, or even knew he existed until the last reveal at the very end of the movie. Clearly enough of a cliff hanger to leave room for another film that I knew about before I even knew what I needed to know after watching that movie.

I just was the idiot that left the subtitles on and spoiled the entire movie, wasting three hours of my life, for something I found out immediately. I ca’t even think of one good example of subtitles use. Honestly the exact same situation happened to me for a second time the next night.

I was watching Entourage for the forty with time and just now learnt the name of the character that plays Ari’s wife. I mean if you search up her name on IMDB it says her name is Ari’s wife. Which is wicked cool, but I accidentally left the subtitles on and saw that her name is in fact Melissa. Reading that kind of ruined the show for me. Being named Mrs. Ari is way cooler.

There the subtitles were again, blowing my mind and ruining everything I’m watching. I refuse to watch anything with subtitles and let them tarnish things for me. The only time I would ever consider using subtitles are if they’re in a different language. At least if I use them that way it’ll be productive.