Is It Me?

Despite how much area this new city takes up, everybody always says, “It’s a small city,everybody knows everybody.”I’m still fairly fresh here and haven’t been around here long enough nor do I know enough people to prove this theory or not. But if that is true it would be answer to all questions I’ve been asking.

I must have caught these girls during a full moon or when they were lost in retrograde or something, because I have been lucky somehow and have recently met a few girls crazy enough to willingly exchange numbers with me. Tragically that’s all it was with some of them, just a simple exchanging of numbers… nothing more than ten new digits in my phone. Other times, very few times, very few times, have I gotten lucky, and have been able to find myself planning a real date with someone. Someone who actually gets me into my only pair of jeans.

I pulled out all the stops that night to keep conversation and hoped to keep them interested and comfortable talking with me. (Not at the same time obviously) I guess in a way it may have seemed like I was interrogating them like a deceptive on a case, when in actuality I’m just looking for some sort of flint or some spark that will strike up conversation between us. With my mind scrambling as irrationally and as fast as it does, without failure it always finds something to create that spark to get the night burning.

One thing I’ve learnt is not to talk to much, I’ve made that mistake way too many times before. On top of that, I can’t stand the to hear the way I talk, why the hell would I make someone else suffer and have to listen to me? None the less a girl I’m hoping to impress? I figured out a long time ago that if I have any way of impressing a girl on a date I knew it was going to be with my listening skills… strictly. I only emphasis my listening skills, because my memory is atrocious.

Some nights the nights end right there after dinner or the couple drinks we shared having nothing in common with them but that one night we had together. On some of my better nights I’ve been able to steal a kiss goodbye before we parted ways for the night and never to be talked were heard from again. On my best night I’ll find someone that is cool enough that our night doesn’t ever end.

If I must be honest, after actually pushing for a real date, planning a night to meet someone, like a real sit down and get to know one another, I have never been able to secure a second date. There have been a few too many times I knew I talked to much and wasn’t worth wasting anyones time or another date over.

I like to think a good guy you know, at least I hope so. At least enough that it would take at least month or two before they realized they made a terrible mistake giving me their time, rather than immediately after the first date. It’s baffled me, for some reason, I haven’t been able to find myself planning a second date, with anyone.

My only theory for why it’s not happening is the same theory that the city seems to have, that everybody seems to know everybody. I can only assume I made the unfortunate mistake of asking out a couple of girls that happened to be in the same friend group. It’s just speculation here, but I can only assume that they all have hung out recently one day, and were all eager to talk about this dreamful date they had with this wicked awesome guy, only for them all to reveal a picture of me at the same time.

I don’t like to assume, I mean you know what they say when you assume, but it’s the only logical explanation. There’s no way I talked enough for them to hate my voice already and I don’t think I’m that unpleasant to not get a second date. What the hell am I doing that’s keeping me from getting another date? They have to all be friends right? I can’t be that bad can I? Or is it me?

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