My Sister’s Wedding

I couldn’t have been more excited to be back home. My sister was getting fucking married. This wasn’t just the biggest moment in her life but probably the biggest day for the Tartarini family. My brothers and I have shown no sign of finding anything compared to what my sister has with her husband. There’s no telling if any of us are ever going to find what they have. The way we saw it was this wedding was for all of us.

Our sister is the oldest of us all and has always been the one to represent us in the best way. She has always kept us in line growing up and I still have the scars on my wrist from her nails to prove it. I wouldn’t be half the man I am today if it wasn’t for her teaching me the right way to be a man. My two brothers are extremely close, but not as close as I am with my sister. I’m the sister she always wanted but never had

The day of the wedding had this exciting dream like aura about it and I couldn’t stop smiling even if I wanted too. My sister was getting married to the man of her dreams and I couldn’t wait to celebrate. I remember the of there wedding my younger brother and I woke up already late. My younger brother and I were passed out in our beds when older brother came by the house to pick us up. Apparently we were suppose to be ready at nine in the morning so we could run all the errands that apparently they trusted us to handle. My older brother gave us an hour to get ready while he crossed off a few things off the to do list.

My older brother took charge being the responsible one and picked up the cake, went to the packie, and picked up the food for the after party at our sisters. Meanwhile my younger brother sat on the couch I sat on the deck as we waited for my brother to come back and pick us up so we could leave. We were going one of the guys houses to hangout with all the groomsmen for a pregame or to get ready or something. It was one of the perks of our sister getting married, we got grandfather into the wedding party and were treated like VIPs. By the time my older brother came back to get us and start the day I was a couple bowls deep and my brother watched about four episodes of the office. We were both ready to go in our own ways.

We mistakenly pissed off our brother one more time when he got back. We had no idea we needed a change of clothes for later. He gave us another five minutes to pack our suits in the car and fill a plastic shopping bag full of clothes to change into to or he was going to leave us. My brother and I heard his message, brushed our teeth, and quickly piled into the car. Apparently there was one more stop we had to do before we could get to the groomsmen house and let the celebration begin.

The one stop we had to do was at our sisters house where all the bridesmaid were getting ready. We unloaded the car with the cake, alcohol, and food for after party after the wedding. We spent a half hour playing with the dog so he wasn’t being a pest while they all got their hair and make up done. We were now later than we were before and had to run off quickly without saying bye to anyone to head to the guys house to pregame. I mean to get ready.

When we got to the friends house we saw the owner and his wife of the house we were going to outside walking their dogs in front of their neighbors. They welcomes us over like they answered the front door on us and said they’ll be right back. They told us to pull all the way up in the driveway because not everyone was here yet. Here we were thinking we were so late and turns out we’re early. We just came from the girls house were they’re all basically ready. We showed up to the guys house and evidently there was two other guys who were running late. When we walked in, one guy was taking a nap, and the others were just hanging upstairs presumably getting ready.

My brothers and I dropped our bags in the living room and set up shop. We left our beers outside since the fridge was packed and it was cold enough outside they’d still stay cold. Then all of a sudden the door bell rang. It was only the three of us in this house and all we heard was someone yell, “Let them in.” come from upstairs. My older brother went and opened a door and it was a guy with a camera. I couldn’t tell you his name but he walked in introduced himself told us what he was here to do and sat with us on the couch watching reruns of the office with us while we waited for everyone from upstairs.

None of us knew each other. My older brother quickly realized that none of us put the tv on. He was sick of watching the play by play on his phone and grabbed the clicker to rush through the channels looking for the college football game he was betting on. It was only the end of the first quarter when he finally switched to it. He had the over on the first downs in the first half (ridiculous I know) and we quickly realized it wasn’t on pace. Then the photographer told us as if we were in charge of this party or maybe because we were the only ones there, that he wanted to take some picture of us before he had to leave.

I don’t think he specifically meant us but again my older brother lead us, when our sister couldn’t, upstairs to go get dressed for the wedding. The three of us cramped into a game room, changed into our suites, while yelling and telling everyone that walked by that it was time to get ready so the photographer could take pictures of us. We did our best to warn everyone and let them know but when we got down stairs after getting dressed, it was once again only my brothers and I and miraculously our sisters finance. Everyone else was still stuck upstairs getting ready.

We spent the last fifteen minutes with the photographer doing our ties, then undoing them, then redoing them, and pretending to fix each others so the photographer could walk away with at least a couple shots of us getting ready. As soon as the photographer finished and left my brother went right back to the game. It was mid way through the second quarter and his bet was feasible. The four of us were all ready and simply chugging beers, watching the game waiting for the others.

My brother got into the game, as he always does, I mean he had some money on it that was going to dictate the rest of his afternoon. My younger brother and I love antagonizing him as much as we can so essentially we’re like his hype man during these things. If things go poorly we’re there to let him know, if things go well we’re the first people to celebrate with him. Luckily today was a good day and he turned out to be on pace to win his bet. With each first down Oklahoma got he’d cheer louder and louder, spiking the interest of all the other guys upstairs. It only took about three first downs of us cheering and yelling obnoxiously at the tv for the rest of the guys to quickly get dressed and come downstairs to hangout with the rest of us.

We had two minutes left in the game and only two minutes to spare until we had to leave. At this point now my brother was the only one who had money on this game. The other nine of us were just in his corner rooting for his bet to hit like we had some incentive on it. Honestly this is when the photographer should have been here. We were all standing around the tv, fully dressed, watching the end of the game yelling at the tv. When Oklahoma scored to hit his first half over on first downs we all celebrated like it was 1999, everyone became invested in that game.

By the time the game finished we were late for the wedding. All of our phones were blown up with missed calls and texts asking us if we’ve left yet. We rushed out of their like fireman when the bell rings racing to the wedding. It was during that chaos my brothers and I met our brother in law for the first time. My older brother grew a mustache for the wedding strictly to annoy our sister in her wedding photos for the rest of her life. She had to stare at him with his hideous mustache for the rest of her life. It’s hilarious. My brother cracked a mustache joke that ended with him, spitting his water out of his mouth outside. When he came back in he looked at us like he recognized us, “You must be Tara’s brothers huh.”

Our brother in law was driving the finance to the wedding so we made it a point to follow them. My older brother was driving and kept us right on his trial. If we weren’t following them there we probably wouldn’t have made it to the wedding. None of us had the address to the function or wherever the hell we were going. We were simply following our new in laws, we had no idea where we were going.

Luckily they had spots reserved for us when we got there, and were definitely waiting on us. Then we all headed into the wedding together. My brothers and I escorted our future brother in law to the venue like he was the president of the United States and we were his secret service detail. This was a big day for us as a family and we had to make sure he got to the alter.

Our mom was the first person to greet us as we walked in. She looked absolutely stunning. Like I said it was a big day for us. She wanted us to make it a point to see our sister, individually, before the wedding starts. I think we all sort of said yeah impulsively and went on into this enormous barn house’s backyard without even hearing her.. The foliage was perfect, the weather was amazing, and we were surrounded by the ones we love most.

My father was rocking his sneakers walking around like he was Robert Kraft. He claimed they helped his back… he’s always complaining about his back. He was on another level that day. He was glowing more that day than any of us have ever seen before. He was excited for his only daughters wedding. Potentially the only Tartarini wedding.

I wore my crocs the staple of the Tartarini family. My black crocs in my black suit made me a heart stopper that night. I was so fly. The only guy that looked better than me was this guy in tuxedo serving free wine from his trunk. He kind of stole the show. He had this vintage car that everyone was taking pictures of and with. I’m not sure if it was the free alcohol or the car but he kept everyone entertained until the wedding started.

Those who weren’t hanging around the car were mingling or taking pictures in the trees in the back. The place was like a dream, it was the perfect spot for a wedding. My brothers went up to see my sister without me knowing. It wasn’t until my mom came up to me and reminded me I needed to go see her before she came out. When I saw her, I couldn’t believe how amazing she looked. I should have known she was going to be looking her best on her wedding night. She’s only been dreaming about it for years now and was glowing with an aura of excitement.

My stay was quick since I was so late going to see her. I was rushed out and had to race to my seat and sit down for the wedding. Our cousin ordained the wedding and was hilarious. His jokes were subtle, the not only broke the ice, but set the tone for the entire night that we were just here to have a good time celebrating a marriage between two people who couldn’t be happier together.

We all took our places in our seats. Our future brother in law stood at the alter patiently awaiting his bride to be to walk out of the barn and down the aisle with our Dad in her arms. It was nice to see our dad had some decency to switch out of sneakers and slip into a pair of actual dress shoes to walk her down the aisle. They were smiling stride for stride with each other every step down to the alter. I’ve never seen either of them smiling as big as they did walking down that aisle.

The ceremony was amazing. Our cousin kept it short, but incredibly sweet so we could hurry up and start celebrating. Slowly but surely we all funneled into our seats. I saw I was sharing the same table as not just my mom and dad and brothers but also my grandmother. I knew right then and there I was going to be a the best table at the whole reception. There was no way they were going to stuff grammy in the back. My brother and I yeah but not anymore if we’re sitting with her. We got the best seat in the house.

We stuffed our faces with I can’t remember what. I just knew that I needed to eat otherwise I was going to spend most of the night in the bathroom rather then out here enjoying my sister wedding. I hadn’t eaten anything all day so I owed it to myself to give my body a fighting chance against my obnoxious alcohol intake. I mean it was an open bar and all so it was tough to slow down. Plus I made an early commitment to wine that night and there’s no coming back.

I sat back in my chair stuffed listening to our cousins, the maid of honor, and our new brother in law give their speeches. Times like that are incredibly sentimental. I love listening to the speeches of the wedding parties. We’re all sitting there listening to the two closets people to the two people we came here to celebrate, talk about how much this day means to them. This is a significant day in someones life. One that people spend their whole lives dreaming about. And they have the inside scoop on how the bride and groom got to this perfect moment that night. Their wedding night.

It was awesome. Just before our brother in law was about to drop the mic and finish his speech, he decided to spill the beans and unveil to everyone that they are expecting a baby. It was a surprise to most. Fortunately my siblings and I got the inside scoop on this and knew ahead of time. Unlike our grandmother.

She had no idea. When our brother in law said it our entire table turned to her to see her reaction or if she heard him. I don’t know if my grammy was being stoic or flat out didn’t hear him but she didn’t react at all. She just sat there cheesing just happy to see one of her many grand daughters getting married. She loves to seeing our family, her family grow and be as happy as we all are.

Once things settled down and everyone got to their seats our sister and our new brother b lined it right to my grandmother. I was sitting across from my grandmother and I remember verbatim the way the conversation went. My sister initially thanked her coming and then asked, “So did you hear anything that caught your attention?”

Again I’m not sure if my grandmother was playing dumb or genuinely didn’t hear the speeches but she answered our sister with a simple, “I heard heard some of it why did I miss something?” It’s impossible for me to put into words how big her smile was and how happy she was to hear that she was pregnant. She was in her seat jumping for joy, wiping tears from her eyes.

The best part about the entire thing is that the photographer captured this exact moment, the moment she found out and it’s the most beautiful picture I have ever seen. My grandmother is an angel and her happiness in that picture is so pure and so honest, it may be the best picture from the entire wedding with them.

After the speeches and things settled down, the dj started the music up by playing the Tartarini’s anthem. We heard that first ding and all leaped from our seats and ran to the dance floor to let loose to Give It Up by KC and The Sunshine. Our entire family filled the dance floor singing and dancing to our favorite song. “Na na na na na na na baby give it up, give it up.” For the four minutes and fourteen seconds we tore up that dance floor. We were doing “The Brent” a dance made famous by our cousin. We couldn’t help ourselves but let loose and give it up.

The dance floor was so hot the dj shut us down after that song. He used the covid restrictions as an excuse to get us off the dance floor and back to our seats. The wedding party was a blast and I don’t think I’ve ever seen my family smile as big as we all were that night. It was an utterly beautiful wedding. Our sister was married to the love of her life. Life was perfect.

We had to leave the function early due to the curfew again due to covid. Honestly I don’t think the dj and the people hosting the wedding were ready to handle us for an entire night. I think they saw what they had gotten into and decided it was best we ended things early. It was better off for everyone that we funnel back to my sisters house to keep the party going and the night

We all left a change of clothes at her space earlier and promptly changed into more relaxing clothes and kept on drinking celebrating this magical night. Our sister was now married and we couldn’t have asked for a better man to be watching over her. Lord knows my brothers and I are sick of dealing with her. She’s his problem now.

Our cousin capped the night off by ordering fifteen pizzas from Dominoes so we could stuff our faces once more before calling it a night. The entire day was perfect start to finish. There is no words that could define how spectacular, how incredible, or how perfect that day was. Our sisters married. We have a new member to our family that we’re welcoming with open arms and another new one expected. That night, life felt absolutely perfect.

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