I Hate Snakes

I don’t know about you but my bathroom is my sanctuary. I spend a decent amount of time in my bathroom during the days. It’s the one place I’ve always been able to be peacefully alone. Growing up in a house fill of six people, the bathroom was the only place we could be alone. I shared a room with my brothers, the bathroom was my getaway.

I love it there. It’s become my favorite room in every place I’ve lived. Sometimes I get stuck reading in there other times I get lost listening to song after song ruing my ear drums blasting my headphones. It doesn’t matter what I do, it’s my time, uninterrupted. There’s nothing worse than when you’re on the porcelain throne and you get rudely interrupted by a phone call. It totally tarnishes the moment and honestly has ruined my day a couple times. Thats my time, I am to be undisturbed.

As of recently my bathroom hasn’t felt like the bathroom I’ve always know it to be. There’s been a spike of viral videos of snakes slithering their way up toilet drains and into the basin of the bowl that have left me petrified to sit down on my toilet. I hate snakes. They frighten me more than anything else in this world. The last thing I expect to happen to me when I sit down to take a shit is to be bite by a damn snake.

Now when I have to poop I flush the toilet three or four times before I sit down to ensuring that there isn’t any snake slithering it’s into my sanctuary. I can only read a sentence or two at a time on my phone because I’m constantly looking between my legs checking to make sure no ones slithered their way up. I rush my poops now and I hate it.

That was my spot, my nirvana, and now I can’t sit down on my own toilet in peace anymore. On the other hand, I’ve seen some of the messes I’ve made in the toilet and props to any snake that’s makes his way through all that and into my toilet specifically. They almost deserve a sweet chomp of my ass. They would’ve earned it, just stay away from everything else.

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